And then. One morning – usually after I've been giving a lot, no matter how joyfully, I wake up tired.
It might be because my husband has been swamped with work and not as available. Or my children might be particularly loud and needy. Perhaps I was too tired to clear the supper dishes and they greet me in the morning when I woke up too late to have a quiet time and now must run out the door to teach. Forget my resolve to wake up early to exercise on top of it all. I'm tired and grouchy.
David is one of my favourite people in the Bible. He has all the reason to be proud – strong, brave, handsome, chosen royalty. He has all the reasons to boast of his spiritual fervour, but instead views himself only in relationship to God. He sees himself as God's servant, and humbly accepts things like wandering around the desert for years and years. He flees from Saul who has lost God's stamp of approval as king and has handed it to David. He refuses to take what is rightfully his, and calls himself a 'dead dog', 'a flea' when addressing himself to Saul, whom he terms "the Lord's anointed."
David is amazing! When they brought the Ark of the Covenant back to Jerusalem, he danced in his underwear – a sign of great humility, not one befitting for a king. He didn't care! He was on fire for God.
If you look at the headlines from the beginning of 2 Samuel, you see things like:
David anointed king over Judah.
Abner (the commander of Saul's army) goes over to David
David becomes king of Israel
David conquers Jerusalem
David defeats the Philistines
The Ark brought to Jerusalem
God's promise to David
David defeats the Ammonites
It's all good! But then – when things couldn't be going any better spiritually for David, he gets ... tired.
In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king's men and the whole Israelite army. They destroyed the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained in Jerusalem.
One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, "She is Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliamand the wife of Uriah the Hittite." -- 2 Samuel 11:1-3
David was tired, and he just didn't feel like doing what he was supposed to anymore. It was spring – a time when kings were supposed to be going off to war. But David (a king) didn't feel like going and sent Joab out in his stead. He was left with a ripe opportunity for temptation.
It's sad when you see how far he falls. He gets Bathesheba pregnant, so – to fix that disaster – he calls her husband home from the war so that her husband can sleep with her and no one will be the wiser. But her husband is too righteous. He sleeps at the palace entrance with the servants because his commander and men are camped in the open fields. "How could I go to my house to eat and drink and lie with my wife? As surely as you live, I will not do such a thing." -- 2 Samuel 11:11
So David keeps him for another night and gets him drunk, hoping that this will do the trick. But Uriah maintains his integrity, even while drunk and doesn't go home. There's nothing left but for David to send Uriah back to Joab, carrying a note in his possession that orders his own demise. David's note tells Joab to put Uriah in the thickest part of the battle, and then to withdraw from him so he may be struck down and die.
When the messenger came to report news of the battle, Joab told him to mention that Uriah was killed, in hopes that it would allay his anger at the troops' losses. To be sure, he handled the news diplomatically. "Don't let this upset you;" he told the messenger. "the sword devours one as well as the other." -- 2 Samuel 11:25
When Bathsheba heard that her husband died, she mourned for him. How could she not? She had married one man who was righteous and loved only her, only to be swapped for another man who added her to his collection of lust – even though he was king. It was not a trade that could bring happiness to a woman.
The story made me think how easy it is to get tired – to let your fervour go. You're loving your neighbour, you're serving the poor, you're begging for people in prayer, you're praising God, you're cleaning your house! – I had to throw that in there – and then you just don't feel like doing it anymore.